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Mr Massagy Review – Rubbing You The Right Way

After almost a year delay, Mr Massagy has finally made its way onto EU PS4’s and it’s a sassy little dating sim that wants to give your back a rub. The FingerGuns Review; The moment that many European trophy hunters […]

After almost a year delay, Mr Massagy has finally made its way onto EU PS4’s and it’s a sassy little dating sim that wants to give your back a rub. The FingerGuns Review;

The moment that many European trophy hunters have been waiting for is finally here – Mr Massagy is available now on PS4 on this side of the Atlantic. Described by our American counterparts as “the second easiest Platinum trophy on PS4”, it’s a game that can be completed and Plat’d in a mere 20 minutes if played alongside a trophy guide – a feat only bested by one of Green Lava Studios’ other PS4 title, My Name Is Mayo. If virtual trinkets are your jam, Mr Massagy will deliver a cheap and quick boost to your trophy count – but I would encourage you to take a bit more time with this game because being a quick Plat isn’t the only positive quality about it.

Mr Massagy is a dating simulator with a few differences. In it you play as the faceless, muscular, graceful man hunk Johnny who has taken to the dating app Linger to find love and, more importantly, a massage. That’s right. A massage.

If you’ve ever used the Tinder app, the screen you’re presented with at the start of the game will be all too familiar. You scroll through a phone looking at portraits of potential dates and can click on the left button to reject or the right button to accept. Each potential date comes with a score rating which relates to difficulty and as a way to curb your progress.

Once you’ve chosen your potential date/masseuse, you’re presented with a basic visual novel-esque mini-game in which you get to try to woo your companion. To do this you get to choose various lines of dialogue, some of which will end the date instantly while others progress the date. Choose the right dialogue options throughout the date and you’ll end the date and you, the player, gets the reward. Earn a 2 or 3 star outcome from the date and the game instructs you to put the Dualshock 4 controller on your neck and the vibration function goes to work, giving you a rumble powered massage. Sure, this is as daft as it sounds – sitting alone with a PlayStation controller on your neck while it tickles your ears is batty but a fun and inventive way to use the PS4 pad. But that’s not ever the craziest aspect of Mr Massagy….

Here’s where things get weird. Not “bad” weird but funny “haha” weird. Each of your dates is absolutely bonkers. Your potential masseuses include (but are not limited too) an undead surfer, a werewolf that’s obsessed with squirrels, a cow, a full body pillow with a woman’s picture on it and that damn jar of Mayonnaise from My Name Is Mayo. Given that these are the types of ladies/inanimate objects that you’re trying to flirt with, you can image how this colours the conversations. There’s absurdity, light hearted profanity, tongue in cheek insults and some fun conversations to be had here.

Mr Massagy is short, however. Played without one of the 700 trophy guides out there on the internet, the game clocks in at under 2 hours. There’s no replayability to the conversation’s either which means it’s a short but sweet experience, even given the artificial ways the play time is extended with filler in between dates (like preventing you from dating some people without changing your Linger profile picture).

This game might be touted around the internet as an easy Platinum trophy for the hunters but unlike so many other games that have released over the past few years that only exist to peddle a Plat, there’s actually a game underneath the taught, muscley surface of Mr Massagy. Sure, it’s short and simple but it still provides a few laughs along the way.

Mr Massagy is available now on PS4 (review version) and PC.

Developer: Green Lava
Publisher: Green Lava

Disclaimer: In order to complete this review, we purchased a copy of the game. For more information, please see our review policy.

Sean Davies

Ungrateful little yuppie larvae. 30-something father to 5. Once ate 32 slices of pizza at an all-you-can-eat buffet.

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